Deep Questions to Ask Your Partner

Not "what's your favorite color" deep — actually deep. These 90 questions are split into 9 topics: worldview, family, love, the future, money, friendship, fears, identity, and a final set of questions meant purely to sit with. Pick a topic, or let the game shuffle through all of them.

Most "deep questions" lists are the same 20 prompts copy-pasted everywhere. Ours are written specifically for couples who want to actually understand each other, not just fill silence. Here's a sample from each topic — the full game has ten questions in every category.

Worldview and Values

  1. What do you believe in, even if you can't prove it?
  2. What does being a strong person mean to you?
  3. Which principles would you never break, even for personal gain?

Family and Childhood

  1. What did your childhood feel like?
  2. How did your family handle conflict?
  3. In what way are you like your parents — and in what way do you not want to be?

Love, Intimacy and Relationships

  1. Do you think love is a feeling or a choice?
  2. What slowly but powerfully destroys a relationship?
  3. What counts as betrayal to you, beyond the obvious?

Future and Meaning

  1. What kind of life do you want to live?
  2. What does "not living life in vain" mean to you?
  3. What dream do you have that you rarely talk about?

Money, Work and Ambition

  1. Does money give you freedom or security?
  2. What matters more to you: work you love or a stable income?
  3. What are you willing to do for your goal?

Friendship and People

  1. How do you know you can trust someone?
  2. What kind of people drain your energy?
  3. What would you never be able to forgive a friend for?

Fears and Vulnerabilities

  1. What are you most afraid of, honestly?
  2. What kind of criticism hurts you the most?
  3. What's still hard for you to forgive yourself for?

Self and Inner World

  1. Who do people think you are, and who are you really?
  2. What makes you feel alive?
  3. What trait of yours did you long consider a weakness?

Deep Questions to Reflect On

  1. Can you love someone and still leave?
  2. What's the difference between loneliness and solitude?
  3. What question are you afraid to ask yourself?

Play through all 90, by topic

Filter by category in the game, or shuffle through everything.

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Before Marriage
A curated set from the future, money, and family topics.
Questions to Ask Your Partner
Our love deck — 100 questions about your relationship day to day.
100 Questions
The full love deck, listed in full, grouped into five themes.
Conversation Cards
What conversation cards are, and how to use them well.