The original test spread across TikTok and Threads as a compatibility check — a set of direct questions designed to surface misalignments before they become dealbreakers. The idea is simple: if you can't answer these together, you need to talk. If your answers point in opposite directions, better to know now.
Below is our version: 30 questions across five categories — values, future, relationship style, family, and dealbreakers. Answer them honestly. No scoring, no percentages. Just a real conversation.
Values
- What does loyalty mean to you — and where's the line?
- How important is religion or spirituality in your daily life?
- What principle would you never break, even under pressure?
- Do you think people can change fundamentally, or are they mostly who they are?
- What do you think a good life actually looks like?
- Is honesty always the right policy, or are there times you'd rather not know?
The Future
- Do you want children? How many, and roughly when?
- Where do you want to live in 10 years — same city, different country, somewhere rural?
- What does financial security mean to you, and how close are you to it?
- How ambitious are you, and how much does your career define you?
- What's a dream you have that we've never seriously talked about?
- If your life looks exactly the same in 5 years, would that be okay?
Relationship Style
- How do you handle conflict — do you confront it or let things settle?
- How much alone time do you need, and do you feel guilty asking for it?
- How do you show love, and how do you need to receive it?
- What does a good week together look like for you?
- Are you happy with how much we talk about the hard stuff?
- What do you need from me that you've never actually asked for?
Family
- How close do you want to live to your family?
- How much do your parents' opinions affect your decisions?
- What did your family get right — and what do you want to do differently?
- If we have kids, how do you imagine splitting responsibilities?
- What role do you expect family to play in our relationship?
- Is there anything from your upbringing that still affects how you act in relationships?
Dealbreakers
- What would make you leave — no matter how long we've been together?
- Is there anything you've never told me that you think I should know?
- What's one thing you're not willing to compromise on?
- How do you feel about where we are right now — honestly?
- Do you feel safe saying the uncomfortable thing to me?
- What would have to change for this relationship to be exactly what you want?
These aren't easy questions. Some of them might start a conversation you've been avoiding. That's the point. The Copenhagen Test isn't a quiz — it's a mirror. How you respond to each other's answers matters just as much as the answers themselves.
How to do it
Sit down together — no phones, no distractions. Take turns asking the questions. Don't rush. If something one of you says is surprising, sit with it before reacting. The goal isn't to get matching answers — it's to actually understand where the other person stands.
You can also use our free card game below to draw questions one at a time, which makes it feel less like an interrogation and more like a real conversation.